Chocolate Chump - The Man, the Myth...

Chocolate Chump - The Odyssey

Does the Chocolate Chump really exist? We say this mythical figure is just that - a myth of yesteryear. As Mr. Dylan likes to point out, "The times, they are a changin'," and so is the world of chocolate!

Chocolate Chump Asks Us to Look Inward

Choco-connoisseurs across the world, the time is now to end the battle over which chocolate type is best--white, dark, or milk? We like to say, as does the lovable Chocolate Chump--chocoholics of the world, unite! If we could just arrive at an agreement over this one pressing, urgent, universal question, there would be an end to political strife and racial discrimination of all kinds. Our earnest correspondent, the Master of All Confections, slight of hand and sharp of tongue, the honorable Reverend Chocolate Chump has a weighty task hunkering down on his shoulders, much like his cousin, Atlas, who holds the weight of the world in his fierce, Schwarzeneggerian grip.

Please take a moment to allow the esteemed Chocolate Chump to razzle-dazzle you into submission. Within the pages of this courageous roman a clef is the story of a sensitive soul who at one time thought a box of Cracker Jacks the height of sophistication. An arduous journey he had, and his fight-or-flight journey will warm you from the inside out - even on the most icy of nights and within endlessly deep and dark seasons. During his odyssey, Chocolate Chump will confront many life-changing obstacles along the way and will find solstice in a bar of chocolate. World peace, although a long ways off, will eventually be the reward at the end of the tale. Buck up, soldiers of chocolate, it's going to be a bumpy ride.